if you're making a guest appearance on "Deadwood," otherwise it's pretty gay. if you are in the city and you see a cowboy he is either a male stripper (yeah, no way those guys are gay) or in a Village People cover band. i think cowboys used to be cool until they found out john wayne and bear bryant were having an affair. there's a reason the marlboro man loved smoking cigarettes just like there's a reason the brits call them fags. i don't know when exactly cowboys stopped being murderous criminals proclaiming their self righteousness behind a badge and started fucking each other in the ass in tents on mountainsides, but i suppose whiskey and train robberies just aren't as appealing as they used to be. i think what ultimately united the cowboy image with homosexuality was those two famous cowboys a couple of years ago, toby keith and kenny chesney. being that i cannot listen to a full song from either of these men because their music gives me explosive diarrhea i cannot tell you how explicitly homosexual or racist their music is, but they always play it at rodeos so it must be pretty strong stuff. i'm sorry, i'm getting a little choked up... i really don't wanna get rid of all my boots!
p.s. be careful of what color bandana you wear when you dress up as a cowboy because someone might think you want to be pooped on or something.
PROPS! photo is courtesy of the artistic talents and genius wit of Phill Mims.
totally bro. remember all those rednecks that dressed like cowboys in highschool? pretty sure they are all out of the closet now. not so sure about that bear bryant comment though...
ReplyDeletei thought you guys were ok with the bear bryant john wayne relationship being that two kids came out of it, nick saban and jeff gordon. i think jeff takes after his daddys.
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